Helicopter Parents

I am worried about the future. I believe parenting is the most important "job" any of us can undertake. It is 24/7 and their is no retirement: once a parent always a parent. There is no ONE correct way to parent. There is no objective evaluation to tell us if we are doing it right. I think there are many people (parents) who approach this undertaking with little thought. One thing I am sure of is that the goal of parenting is to raise children who won't need parenting (that is productive, self-sufficient members of society). In order to achieve this, parents will have to make their children do things they don't like and will have to stand aside and let their children handle their own problems. I get the shivers when I hear a 14 year old girl exclaim "Oh my mom's my best friend!" My daughters talk to me about a lot of stuff (I won't say they tell me 'everything' because I am their mom, and I assume some censuring takes place). I do my best to be loving and supportive. But they know ultimately I will tell them to do the right thing (not the easy one). They count on me to be a pillar they can count on. My answers don't change. I assure them there is someone in charge, someone who will reign them in amidst their craziness (that is called teen-aged years). Where is all this coming from? I have been reading and hearing about the new generation of parents dubbed "Helicopter Parents" because they hover over their children. There are parents who are calling college professors over grades, going with their grown (19-22 yrs old) children on job interviews and calling employers if their child doesn't get the job, demanding to know why. I've been hearing about this more and more. I am flabbergasted over this. "I just can't stand to see Johnny suffer." "Johnny's such a good kid, I'll do everything possible to make life better for them." And on and on. But from where I stand, these parents are selfish. It's a heck of a lot easier to jump in and fix things then to watch your child struggle. It's hard to watch your child suffer consequences for their behavior whether it's a low grade from lack of work, or a broken friendship. It's so much easier to do their school project than to spend the time and effort helping and guiding them (and watching them do it differently than I would). Helicopter Parenting is a huge disservice to a child and instead of producing a productive member of society, it produces a person who feels entitled, doesn't accept responsibility for their actions, and isn't very good at problem solving. In addition, these parents are making my job raising my children harder because my children see these other parents "rescuing" their kids. If you don't want the work of parenting, don't become a parent. It is hard work. It is exhausting work. There are days that I wish I could take a vacation from parenting. But my kids bring great joy. And I can't describe the great feeling that comes from watching them stand up and take responsibility for their actions.