Education

I receive short summaries of educational news articles from ASCD (Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development) each day. I can then link to the full story if I wish. It keeps me informed about the educational community even if I'm no longer in the classroom. Yesterday, I read this header: Columnist: Great Web sites for students to bookmark. The list is pretty good, but as I already had quite a few of the sites bookmarked, I was a little disappointed. But I've printed out the list and given it my girls so they can add the appropriate ones to their favorites.
Education is a hot topic in this country. And that is not something new. In 1957, when the USSR (that's the former Soviet Union, for those of you under 20)sent Sputnik into orbit, there was a huge uproar about the poor quality of education, specifically science education, in the U.S. Today we have NCLB and most states have some high stakes test students must pass certain years. In Florida, we have the FCAT. Many teachers refer to it as a four-letter-word. I will concede that there is room for improvement in the system (primarily...teachers need to be observed more by their administrators and made to use recognized educational best-practices, but that's a whole different blog), and that some schools need a complete overhaul. I will also say schools reflect society. If reading and thinking are not valued outside of school, the school system cannot instill those values. The school system has a child 7 hours a day, 180 days a year. If we say that a child sleeps 9 hours a day, that still leaves 8 hours not accounted for by sleep or school. If we eliminate weekends, there are 261 work-days in a year. There are 180 days of school. That leaves 81 weekdays that children are not in school (add in the 104 weekend days and students go to school only 1/2 the days out of a year) and are in school for about 1/2 the waking hours of a day. That means they are in school about 1/4 of their waking hours each year. That leaves 3/4 of the time that they are being influenced by something other than their teachers. Yet teachers, not parents, are held accountable for the academic progress a child makes in a year.
Jack Fernandez, a local community columnist in Tampa, wrote a great piece entitled, "Dinner Table Doubles As Institution of Learning." Most of what he says seems pretty obvious. With the growth of the electronic handhelds industry, more and more people are spending less and less time with direct personal interaction. Dinner is a great time to connect with those who are important to you. At our dinner table we do 'best-worst.' Each person gets to tell the worst and the best things about their day. [We begin with worst because we want to end on a positive note.] As a parent, it's a great way to find out about things that are important to your child. "Suzie yelled at me at recess and we didn't speak the rest of the day," lets me know a lot about what's happening. It's a way for Hubby and me to show we have disappointments and frustrations, too. Occasionally, my worst is "My children don't listen." This usually elicits laughter and if things had been tense, it clears the air a little. It sure beats, "What happened at school today?" or "How was school today?"

Still looks like Ernesto is going to miss us. We're not out of danger yet as we're still in the cone of destruction. A wobble to the west and we get much higher winds and more rain. A wobble to the east and the moisture will actually get sucked out of our area by the storm and we'll have dry weather. Hope it takes a big jog to the east and misses the Carolinas.

Romance Is Alive and Well

Seems as if we've dodged the bullet once again. Of course, Tampa is still in the "cone of uncertainty" a.k.a. "cone of destruction", but unless Ernesto pulls a fast one, we should be okay, especially since we find ourselves on the western edge of the storm. (You never want to be to the east of the storm.)

I had the immense pleasure of being part of a truly romantic marriage proposal this weekend. Marie (Hubby's cousin's wife's niece...got it?) is a wonderful 27 year old. She has been dating Fred, another wonderful 27 year old. They met at church. Everyone in the family adores Fred. [And there wasn't much adoration for Marie's last 2 beaus.] Fred asked the Fearsome Foursome [the Singer, the Imp and their cousins, S and B] to help him plan the event. The Fearsome Foursome wrote a play (they're all A-1 hams) in which a princess is forced to marry an evil witch's son (so the witch can gain control of her kingdom). So we had a family "Back to School" celebration on Saturday. Marie shows up (not knowing Fred is upstairs hiding) and the kids get her to help them practice their play. She will play Princess Marie (cute, huh?). She's a great sport and reads her script as asked in front of the other 8 of us. At the point where she is about to be married to the witch's son, the priestess asks, "Does anyone know why these two people should not be wed?" In runs Fred, yelling, "I object!" He proceeds to get down on one knee, pulls out a gorgeous ring and proposes to Marie. It was quite the experience. Fred is quite eloquent and in his proposal mentioned his desire to make a life with Marie with Christ as the center. Gosh, doesn't get much better than that. So Fred's nice, Christian, romantic, AND good looking. No wonder we all like him. The warm, hot-chocolaty feeling returns when I think of it.

Hurricane Ernesto

It's that time of year. Hurricanes. August and September are the big hurricane months for the Gulf of Mexico. The thing about hurricanes in the Gulf, there is only one water-path entry/exit point: the Yucatan Channel. And hurricanes normally go through the Caribbean Sea, and then enter the Gulf through the Yucatan Channel. Once in the Gulf, the question is not longer, "Will the hurricane hit land?" but becomes, "Where will it hit?" Living in Tampa, we of course hope we are not hit. But once a hurricane is in the Gulf, it feels wrong to wish it to go hit someone else. But that's the position we will be in soon. The projected path has Ernesto crossing over Tampa Thursday morning at 8:00am. Tampa's location is 27.91 degrees north and 82.53 degrees west. (For simplicity's sake, I had my students remember 28 N and 82 W. Easy to remember since the numbers are inverted.) The track published by the local news has Ernesto at 28.0 degrees north and 82.5 degrees west. Does not make me sleep well at night. So Hubby and I are reviewing are plans... Stay? Go? Where to go? What to bring? Always knowing hindsight is 20/20 and that evacuating when in Florida is an iffy proposition. Florida's a peninsula that is less than 150 miles across (Katrina's winds reached 120 miles from her center). So where do you evacuate if you're in Florida? It's over 200 miles north to drive out of Florida. So the concept is not to escape the winds, just the flood waters. Shopping tonight (if you wait until Tuesday or Wednesday there won't be anything left on the shelves). Coincidentally, today is the anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. Now we sit and wait and watch the TV. It is the waiting that is so exhausting. [I know this from the 2004 season.]

Favorite Authors

I read so much that it's hard for me to pick a favorite author. Maybe picking a favorite author from various categories, but still, it would be quite difficult. Emily Bronte, R.D. Robb, C.S. Lewis, Lois Lowry, Stephen Ambrose, Tom Clancy, John Grisham. Then I read this article about college (yes, that's college) students not being able to list any authors other then Dan Brown. So at breakfast this morning, the Singer says, "Mom, did you see the article about those kids not knowing any authors?" "Yea, I did." Then she and the Imp proceed to list their favorite authors (each had more than 3). My girls read a lot, too. Is there anything else better than curling up in a big chair with a good book on a rainy afternoon? I don't think so. If I hadn't taught school, I would swear that these articles are made up, but I know all too well that many people today don't read (except txt msgs and blogs). The excuse is no time. The answer...turn off the T.V. (or computer or whatever other electronic device you are playing with).
As it is overcast and a Saturday, I think I'll go curl up with my current library book, Glory in Death.

Too Much Love?

Just when you thought you'd heard it all...I was making dinner last night, listening to the news and I heard, "she was taken away from her aunt and uncle because they loved her too much." My first thought was "what do they mean by 'love'? And I worried that there was some form of sexual abuse. No, it appears the judge thought the couple was building such a strong bond, that they were making a reunion between the child and her mother more difficult (and the goal is ALWAYS reunion, no matter what) so he had the child removed from their home. It makes one wonder. For all practical purposes this has a happy ending. But what did the past 4 years of uncertainty do to this young girl? I believe people should be given a second chance. I don't think they should be given numerous chances especially when their mistakes are causing harm to children.

Florida Thunderstorms

The Singer is moping around tonight. Swim practice has now been cancelled for the first two practices (yesterday and today). In Florida, having swim practice outdoors at 5pm in the afternoon makes the chances of practice cancelled due to lightning very good. But, the Singer is moping because practice wasn't cancelled due to the weather, but because of the faculty advisor not being able to be there. The Singer loves to swim (and in fact prefers practice to the meets, because she likes to swim and likes to be pushed) and was looking forward to the practice starting. In addition, because school is 25 minutes away, when practice gets cancelled, she gets to hang out and wait in the hot sun for me to get there to pick her up. I sure hope practice is held tomorrow because I don't think the Singer or I could handle the disappointment of cancelled swim another day in a row.
Now that school is underway, our "school-year" schedule has begun. From now until late November/early December, the Singer will be swimming from 5-6:30 Mon thru Thurs, so dinner is at 7:00. Choir has started back up on Sunday evenings. Both girls are in that. Youth BEAT (the high school youth group at our church) begins in Sept and the Singer is on the Teen Advisory Board. The Imp starts dance in September. Hubby starts teaching Faith Formation to 7th graders on Wednesday evenings in September and I'll be teaching adult confirmation preparation. The Imp wants to take drum lessons, too. And she's trying out for the school volleyball team (she's not sure she'll make the team...but I'm proud of her for trying out). So while I'm busy with my consultation work and the household chores/errands during the day, my real work begins at 3pm and goes hard and long until about 10 pm. Isn't life great!

How Much Is Too Much?

I was out shopping the other day (at Walmart) getting a list of needed items from a new iron, to vitamins, to shampoo. While there, I saw a cute top that I thought the Singer might like. And as it wasn't very expensive, I decided to get it. And now that I don't go to work, my new "uniform" is shorts and T-shirt, I decided to pick up a new pair of shorts. Then I saw these cute tank-tops for $5. So I decided to pick one up. As I looked at all the things in my cart, I wondered, "How much is too much?" Could I make it without the new pair of shorts? Yes. Although, I'll feel better going on errands in the new shorts than a few of my old ratty ones. Does the Singer already have enough tops? Of course. But how many shirts constitutes too many? I was really struggling with this. This is a topic that I revisit from time to time, but until recently, I didn't really have enough money to worry too much about it. After all, if I don't have the money, I'm not buying the clothes. With the Imp's receiving a scholarship for her tuition this year, our disposable income increased. I felt guilty being able to buy "on impulse." The clothes were not on my list. If you have the money, how big a house is too big? How much travelling, vacations, etc. is overindulgence or acceptable? These ideas have been hovering in my mind as I read of houses being sold in my area with 5,000 square feet for $900,000. Is THAT too much? These thoughts were swirling through my head with no real answers materializing (no pun intended) when I read Cindy's blog that linked me to Randy's Ruminating and the heart-wrenching picture and story. This brought me back to "How much is too much?" and "What am I called to do with what I have?" I determined there are no easy answers and the 'too much' is not an exact quantity. The big decisions are easy...it's the little ones...the extra movie, the extra dinner out, the new CD, etc. All of that money added together is quite a bit. No real answers here. Sorry, if you thought I had them. Just food for thought. How much IS too much?

Laughter

As I look around, it occurs to me that laughter is the key to survival. I saw an ad for the Dr Phil show where couples married only a few years were ready for divorce. It showed them arguing and being meaner to each other than I think I've ever been to anybody. Whenever I see this kind of stuff, I immediately do a self-inventory on my own marriage. Hubby and I argue, we've been known to yell at each other and there are definitely times when we really don't like each other very much and don't want to spend time together. But by and large, we really enjoy each other's company. Laughter has kept us together. Imagine...it's 2 AM, baby's screaming, no formula is ready, so the powdered kind must be mixed with water. Hubby's walking screaming baby. I'm mixing formula in the nice glass jar we've been using for this. Hubby's only half-awake. I'm less awake than that. Glass jar slips out of my hands and shatters all over the floor. First reaction is expletives that shouldn't be repeated. Then anger at the carelessness of the action. Now I have a screaming baby, no formula made and a wet mess filled with glass shards all over the floor. But as we looked at each other, we started laughing. Saved the day. There are so many examples like this. Burnt dinner, forgotten items, etc. Laughing releases the same tension yelling does, but leaves a much better after taste and it doesn't escalate the issue. So I vote for laughter as the cure all for the world.
My niece, Lauren, likes to refer to herself as "blonde," and while her hair color does qualify her (and sometimes even her actions do), she's much less a blonde than she thinks. She has collected quite a few blonde jokes, so when I read this joke yesterday, I thought of her and had to share. Joke: Why do so many blondes move to L.A.? It's easy to spell.
I actually have a calendar "joke of the day" that I have sitting at my computer desk. Some are amusing, but this one caused me to laugh out loud.

Love Languages

Back to school time always brings out the insecurities in my girls. They both have pretty good coping mechanisms, but the signs of insecurity are still there. At times like these, they both crave and "request" their primary love language. Gary Smalley has written a number of books about relationships, but his book on the five love languages has really altered the way I interact with those I love. The Imp's love language is definitely Physical Touch. So she was staying close today and when Hubby went back to read tonight, she grabbed her book and went and climbed in next to him. She is a self-confident, independent, emotionally stable girl. She stays that way be being rejuvenate at home. She's asked for her back to be rubbed as she went to sleep every night this week. In a week or two, she'll back off a little. It took me a while to "tune into" the Imp's love language because of the 5 languages, Physical Touch is my "weakest" language. Living with the Imp for almost 13 years, I'm much better at this language than I use to be. The Singer has been "searching" for Words of Affirmation. A little praise and her love tank is all filled up and she's ready to face the world. In the same vein, a harsh comment is devastating to her and I watch what I say especially during these stressful, anxious days of the new school year. As Words of Affirmation is my primary love language, the Singer and I have little problems communicating affection for each other. Hubby's language is Acts of Service (not unusual in men BTW). It's taken 22 years to convince him that a short love note (which takes about 10 minutes to write) has more impact for me than him scrubbing the kitchen floor (a 2 hour task). I highly recommend this book to everyone, but it's a great engagement gift if you know someone who is getting married. While Hubby has learned words are powerful, I've also learned to translate his Acts of Service into the message of love he intends. I guess the best thing about the book is that it has given us (as a family) a vocabulary to talk about our feelings and it has given us a way to classify the way we say, "I love you," to each other.
As I've been reading Cindy's blog often, my girls have heard me comment on how lucky they are to have had the secure life they have. Tonight at prayers, the Imp thanked God for not being in an orphanage or foster home. I call that real progress in recognizing her blessings.

Helicopter Parents

I am worried about the future. I believe parenting is the most important "job" any of us can undertake. It is 24/7 and their is no retirement: once a parent always a parent. There is no ONE correct way to parent. There is no objective evaluation to tell us if we are doing it right. I think there are many people (parents) who approach this undertaking with little thought. One thing I am sure of is that the goal of parenting is to raise children who won't need parenting (that is productive, self-sufficient members of society). In order to achieve this, parents will have to make their children do things they don't like and will have to stand aside and let their children handle their own problems. I get the shivers when I hear a 14 year old girl exclaim "Oh my mom's my best friend!" My daughters talk to me about a lot of stuff (I won't say they tell me 'everything' because I am their mom, and I assume some censuring takes place). I do my best to be loving and supportive. But they know ultimately I will tell them to do the right thing (not the easy one). They count on me to be a pillar they can count on. My answers don't change. I assure them there is someone in charge, someone who will reign them in amidst their craziness (that is called teen-aged years). Where is all this coming from? I have been reading and hearing about the new generation of parents dubbed "Helicopter Parents" because they hover over their children. There are parents who are calling college professors over grades, going with their grown (19-22 yrs old) children on job interviews and calling employers if their child doesn't get the job, demanding to know why. I've been hearing about this more and more. I am flabbergasted over this. "I just can't stand to see Johnny suffer." "Johnny's such a good kid, I'll do everything possible to make life better for them." And on and on. But from where I stand, these parents are selfish. It's a heck of a lot easier to jump in and fix things then to watch your child struggle. It's hard to watch your child suffer consequences for their behavior whether it's a low grade from lack of work, or a broken friendship. It's so much easier to do their school project than to spend the time and effort helping and guiding them (and watching them do it differently than I would). Helicopter Parenting is a huge disservice to a child and instead of producing a productive member of society, it produces a person who feels entitled, doesn't accept responsibility for their actions, and isn't very good at problem solving. In addition, these parents are making my job raising my children harder because my children see these other parents "rescuing" their kids. If you don't want the work of parenting, don't become a parent. It is hard work. It is exhausting work. There are days that I wish I could take a vacation from parenting. But my kids bring great joy. And I can't describe the great feeling that comes from watching them stand up and take responsibility for their actions.

Time for Us

Saturday night was absolutely wonderful. Hubby and I went to our first meeting with our new TEAM. Teams of Our Lady is an international movement of married couples whose purposes in the Movement and in Team life are: 1) growth in the spiritual life of the couple and family through a program of prayer and study, 2)growth in communication between husband and wife with a developing intimacy through shared prayer and regular in-depth talks, and 3)a way of life designed to make their Christian faith a daily living experience. Each Team is made up of 5 to 7 couples and a Spiritual Counselor. Hubby and I joined TEAMs about 4 years ago. We had a nice group and it lasted about 1 1/2 years. We had 2 couples who moved out of town and another couple who really couldn't commit the time so our TEAM dissolved. We have been searching for a new TEAM ever since. Well, we found one! Team couples meet once a month for an evening of a shared meal, fellowship and some study topic. Our Team is studying the Theology of the Body. The whole evening was just so enriching. We knew or had met all the other couples in our new Team except one. So, we didn't feel "new." These are 5 other couples who are committed to God, marriage and family. As we were driving home, I said to Hubby, "They're just nice people." I am so thrilled to be back involved in this.
Then yesterday, Hubby took me out to the movies. We saw World Trade Center. It was very good. It is definitely a 2 hankie movie. I highly recommend it. But better than the movie was just the time for me and Hubby. Hubby will still be here long after the girls grow up, move out and create their own families. It's comforting to know my best friend isn't going anywhere.

Offering Support Across the Miles

Earlier today, I received very sad news. Cindy's daughter, Sarah, had a miscarriage. This is one of those times when I wish I knew what to say. Children are so close to our hearts. Losing them, at any point in their lives, is difficult. As I've heard over and over again, parents shouldn't have to bury their children. Hubby's grandmother buried her daughter when Grandma was 90 and her daughter (Aunt Mary) was 63. Even then, it just didn't seem right that Grandma should be at her daughter's funeral.
It is at time like these, that I ponder how people without survive. I have to trust that God has a plan I don't understand. Because, I don't understand this at all.
Today I was thankful for modern technology. To be able to reach across the miles (and see others do the same) to offer comfort, makes me feel like I have done some good. (We all seem to need to "DO" something when tragedy strikes. It somehow makes us feel less out of control.)
Here's to trusting in God during the good times and bad.
God Bless.

Red Tide

I love going to the beach. In fact, it is one of the most self-indulging things I like to do. To be properly done, you most go for at least 3 hours and as it is over an hour's drive to get to my favorite beach; it is really an all day affair for me. Unfortunately, I don't know how much longer I will be able to go. Red Tide is once again inching its way up the coast of Florida. Red Tide is a nasty occurrence. It is a "bloom" or over-production of algae in the water. This algae kills sea-life and produces gases which cause your eyes, nose and lungs to burn. The dead fish wash up on shore causing quite a stench themselves. Needless to say, the beach outing loses its appeal with dead fish and nauseous gases around.

Last night the Imp's school had Open House. Hearing the principal talk, made me so happy to be a part of this school. The theme this year is "Family." And she truly works at creating a family atmosphere (caring, encouraging, in-this-together, and loving). As a small private K-8 school, we have 4 male teachers on staff (in addition to the boys coach and the technology coordinator). I'm happy the Imp is content here, and know she is learning the really important things in life. The "school paper barrage" has begun. I had 6 forms to fill out, most of them saying I had read the packet of papers that came with the form. The avalanche of paper won't stop until next summer. The hardest part is really reading it all, because just as soon as I say...been there, done that...something will have changed and I will miss some key piece of information. So I read all that is sent home. And yes, other parents (including my husband) call on me to summarize the information for them and alert them to the really key things.

The girls are using their "Unlimited TV" and "Stay in PJs All Day" coupons today. They've each camped out in front of a TV/DVD player and essentially haven't moved all day. They usually use this earlier in the summer, but both feel this is a great way to say farewell to vacation.

New Beginnings

These last few days before school have actually been very enjoyable. Last year at this time I found myself getting ready to teach Algebra I to a small group of 8th graders at The Imp's school. I went into the principal's office to volunteer some of my free time to tutor, and walked out agreeing to teach a full year course everyday. What can I say, the principal is very good at her job. While I love teaching and have missed my years outside the classroom, last year was quite a demand on my time. The fact that the school was a good 20 minute drive, and add to that needing to be at school at least 15 minutes before class and usually staying a good 40 minutes after class (to grade and prepare for the next day) I actually spent 2 1/2 hours a day on this course. At the end of last year, I told the principal, that while I thoroughly enjoyed teaching this small class, that I would not be volunteering to do it again. So my days are stretching before me.
I'm almost giddy with the anticipation of all the thing I'll be able to accomplish once the girls are in school. One of which is being a table leader at a Tuesday morning Bible study. I missed this Bible study last year and am anxious to get back to it. I'll also be teaching an adult ed course at my church to adults preparing for Confirmation. No fear of me becoming bored.
In a short 6 years, I'll be sending the Imp off to college. People ask me what I'll do then. I don't know. I love teaching but in my old age have become impatient with the bureaucracy of the educational system. I'm enjoying the online consulting, but miss the one-to-one contact of the classroom. Maybe I'll go back to school and learn something new to do.

School Anxiety

Well, I thought I had more time before the intense Beginning of the School Year anxiety set in. School for the Imp starts next Thursday. Last night (early this morning) at 1:30 am, she comes into my room. "Mom," she whispers. "I can't sleep." Oh my! A week of no sleeping! I'm not sure I'll survive. I'm one of those people who desperately need my sleep. Interrupted sleep is the worst kind. I almost do better on 4 hours of sleep then on 6 hours, interrupted in the middle. So, I went and sat with her on her bed, rubbed her head and back and helped her relax enough to go to sleep. I tried to wear her out today so she'd sleep tonight. We went to Bush Gardens for the day. I might have succeeded too well. She fell asleep in the car on the way home! Aagh! The Imp is really more excited than anxious, but the result is the same.
The Singer is getting a little anxious about school because she hasn't finished her summer reading yet. She had four books to read. She's completed one and is half way through another. She has to finish that one tomorrow, as it's due at the library. That'll give her a week or so for the last two. She's got a heavy schedule this year with 3 AP classes (English, Am. History and Calculus). We'll see how she does. Last year, she hit a bump in Algebra II, but I think that'll help her this year. She finally learned how to study math. Until then she got by on natural ability. Calculus could be interesting. She's swimming at the Y trying to get into shape for swim season which starts right away. She hadn't been swimming in a while and when she went yesterday wasn't happy with how hard her workout was for her. [There is no way I could have done her 'easy' workout. 500 meter warm up. 200 meter of each breast, back and free at a strong pace. 500 meter warm down. Yea, that's easy.] She'll get right back into it.
Public schools began today (maybe the Imp was having sympathy pains and will sleep well until next Wednesday night). Hillsborough County (Tampa area) is the 9th largest school district in the nation. Here are some amazing stats.
There are 202 schools in the county (132 elementary, 43 middle, 3 K-8, 24 high schools)
There are an additional 73 centers (charter schools, early childhood centers, exceptional education centers, etc)
195,000 expected students (these projected numbers have never been over the actual number who show up by September)
1,922 portable classrooms to meet mandated class sizes.
70 schools expected to be over capacity.
Almost 1,000 school buses carrying more than 92,000 students.
There are more the 21,000 bus stops in Hillsborough County.
There are crossing guards at 254 locations.
5 new schools opened today housing almost 6,000 students.
1490 new teachers were hired.
200 more teachers still needed. (Want a job?).
Almost 15,000 teachers work in the county.
With the class size amendment passed a few years ago, individual schools will have to average 18 students per class K-3; 22 students per class 4-8; and 25 in core high school classes.

I still have to get the Imp shoes for school, but other than that, she is packed and ready to go. She wants a new backpack. She got one last year and it's still in fine shape. If she wants it, she buys it. So she's scoping out the ads. She's willing to spend some money.

Family

We had a great family dinner tonight. Lots of laughter and just enjoying each other's company. Somehow we began to talk about families. The Imp said "Well, you know how Mom's one of eight and Dad's one of ten, well we're really part of four. Sean and Ben (cousins) are like our brothers. The only thing the prevents them from being our siblings is our birth parents."
The rest of us howled pretty loudly. The truth is, the boys are almost like brothers with the girls and all the adults are happy with the arrangement and that they are exposed to the silliness and awkwardness of the opposite sex that they would've missed in a single sex sibling home.