Father's Day

Father's Day. It never really gets the "hype" of Mother's Day. You don't hear people gasping in condemning misbelief if a grown child admits to not talking to their dad on Father's Day (the same admission on Mother's Day could get you permanently ostracized). Mother's Day commercials talk of "show her you love her by..." Father's Day commercials just show dad's using the product (implying dad's don't need to be reassured of their love).
All I know is that fathers and mothers are different. And I'm so happy I had both growing up and am eternally grateful my girls have both. I see them interact with him, doing things I'd never do with them, saying things they'd never say to me, and teasing each other in ways Mom (that's me) is compelled to say "Don't do that!" Studies show that girls with an active male parental figure in their lives a) perform better in school, b) are less likely to use drugs, and c) are less likely to be sexually active. Not a real surprise there. I know if I tell my girls they are pretty, they are pleased, but not necessarily convinced. If Hubby tells them they are pretty, they beem.
I know my own father influenced me. For as much as he is a product of his generation and therefore has deeply held views of men and women's roles, he told me and made me believe, I could do anything if I tried. He taught me to be independent, never wanting me to be "a poor helpless female". At the same time, I know he sized up Hubby in terms of whether he would financially provide for me and take care of me.
Hubby's dad influenced him, too. His dad was a Westinghouse employee for 40-some-odd years in a steel-mill town in western Pennsylvania. He did not graduate from high school, but he is one smart man. Today, he would easily get a scholarship for an engineering program. He taught, through example, that you put your family first and do whatever it takes to care for them. At one point, he held down 3 jobs to keep his family of 10 children provided for. He never complains. His motto, although never explicitly stated: Just Do It. I'm so lucky to have Hubby who learned so many unspoken lessons from his dad.
I am disheartened when I think of the number of children who are growing up without fathers. (That is not to say that children without fathers in their lives are doomed, but their way is so much easier with that positive influence in their lives.)
I'd like to salute all the fathers who do so much with much less fan-fare and thanks than is their due. So many are silent doers, like my father-in-law, not looking for kudos or recognition, but keep on keeping on becasue it is the right thing to do.
Happy Father's Day.