There Ought To Be A Law

I've been thinking a lot about the saying "there oughta be a law..." It sounds so good. Yea, we should have a law to make people behave the way I think they should. But really, we have enough laws. You constantly hear the argument against some laws that you can't legislate morality. Well, I think we try to legislate common sense. Do I really want my government making laws dictating the ingredients allowed in restaurants (i.e. types of oil)? Let people think for themselves. There is a big difference between immediate poisons and long term/large use effects. I'm not sure where to draw the line. I have always been a proponent of seat belt laws. But, now, I don't know. I have no problem making a law regarding children, as they are not, by definition, able to make certain decisions. But shouldn't I be able to decide whether I want to wear a seat belt. I also don't have an issue with me being responsible for more of my out of pocket medical expenses were it determined I wasn't wearing a seat belt during an accident and I am injured. I'll accept the consequences of my decisions, but let me make the decision. It just feels like we really are passing laws that simply began with someone saying, "You know, there oughtta be a law about ..." The more we legislate the less we hold ourselves accountable and the easier it becomes to say, "well, there isn't a law so it must be okay." The ability to decide and then take responsibility for our decisions is the hallmark of being an adult. Don't take that away from me.

I was reading a "Marriage Minute" by Gary Smalley (I get them emailed to me on a regular basis) and he was talking about listening. While in theory I agree with what he said, I take issue with some of it. He said active listening requires you to ask questions of the speaker. Yes and no. Yes some kind of questions do indicate your interest and the fact that you are actually hearing what is being said, but I have had many people tell me that I'm a great listener and I make it a point to NOT ask questions. I think too many questions actually make a person feel "on the spot" and defensive. Someone telling me about their medical treatments doesn't need me to question all the details and inquire as to second opinions, etc. Responding to the feeling, not the facts, is what I think is important. I know people who I don't share much with anymore because of their questioning. "Why didn't you...? Where? When? How? Who?" It makes me feel like they're filling out a check list and are more concerned with the story than with me.